


From the Past

by WildwingSuz



Series: Future, Present, and Past [3]
Category: The X-Files
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-22
Updated: 2015-03-22
Packaged: 2018-03-19 02:31:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,196
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3593013
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WildwingSuz/pseuds/WildwingSuz
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Scully’s thoughts on their first time after they’ve gone on the run in The Truth.</p>
            </blockquote>





	From the Past

**Author's Note:**

> Yes, another all things fic. Sue me if you don’t like it; I sometimes help myself doze off by imagining different scenarios of what happened in the missing time of that ep. Beats counting sheep, trust me.
> 
> This is the third in a triptych of stories starting with To the Future and In the Present. 
> 
> Spoilers: all things and The Truth.

From the Past  
By Suzanne L. Feld  
Rated NC-17

 

August 2002  
Another cool desert night, another cheap anonymous motel, another guest book signed George and Sally Hale. We’d been on the run for only a few weeks but already it felt like a lifetime.

I lay there for a while after our lovemaking late that night, listening to Mulder snore lightly next to me, reveling in the feel of his strong arms around my naked body. I often had trouble dozing off these days and to help myself get to sleep liked to recall that never-to-be-forgotten first time between us. 

***

I went to him in darkness.

This had been coming for a long time, years in fact. I wasn’t sure which of us was in more denial; we may have been evenly matched in that department for all we knew. There was no doubt whatsoever that we desired and loved each other, no doubt that eventually this would happen. Now that it was about to, now that I had finally come to peace with everything that had passed previously in my life, I was a little nervous but a lot more aroused.

I stood by the side of his bed and undressed, not being particularly quiet, watching his sleeping face in the shadows. Though there were no lights on other than the aquarium in the other room, sufficient illumination from the outside streetlight came in to light the bed clearly enough for me to see what I was doing. 

It wasn’t until I was in the midst of removing my nylons that he started awake, sitting up suddenly enough that I nearly fell over my own feet, stockings tangled around my knees as I reached out and steadied myself on the bedside table. “Scully? That you?”

“It’s me, Mulder,” I said, still holding onto the small table as I worked the nylons the rest of the way off one foot at a time. “I, um, I didn’t think you’d mind if I joined you.”

He was staring at me, hair spiked from sleep and covers pooled around his waist, eyes wide in the dimness as I shed my panties. “You, uh, want to sleep in my bed?”

I lifted the comforter and sheet and slid in next to him naked, feeling a shock all along my nerves where we briefly touched from shoulder to hip. From what I could feel he was wearing only boxers or light pajama pants. “Yes, I want to share it with you,” I said quietly as we sat next to each other in the dimness, just touching. “Unless you don’t want me here.”

He put one arm around my shoulders, tugging me closer, and as I turned to put both arms around his bed-warmed torso he reached over and circled my waist with his other hand, pulling me against him. “Trust me, Scully, that thought never crossed my mind,” he assured me in a sleep-scratchy voice. “But can you give me five minutes in the bathroom? You promise not to go anywhere?”

I smiled against his neck. “I can do that.” I didn’t admit that I had just come out of the bathroom myself, having brushed my teeth with the supplies I left here, just like he had a toothbrush at my apartment. Nothing broke the mood faster than morning—or in this case night since it was barely after midnight—breath, and I was determined that nothing was going to stop this if it was in my power.

Mulder let go of me and slid out of bed, hitching up his yellow pajama pants, and padded across the room. As the bathroom door closed and a dim light went on beneath it I laid back on his bed, snuggling down into the body-warmed covers, pulling them over me and turning my face to breathe in Mulder’s rich, musky man-scent from his pillow. My heart was pounding along at a merry pace, not panicked-racing but much faster than its normal beat.

The bathroom door opened just a few minutes later; my heart jumped before settling into an even faster rhythm, and I turned my head to watch him saunter back to the bed backlit by the soft yellow light since he didn’t turn it off. With no ado he dropped the pajama bottoms, giving me a brief glimpse of his sizeable erection, and slid under the covers, gathering me against him with both arms around my shoulders, cuddling me close to him on our sides facing each other. I clutched at his shoulder with my free hand, holding him just as tightly. One large hand cupped the back of my head as he burrowed his face into the nook between my shoulder and neck. Everywhere we touched tingled, with deeper points of heat where my breasts were pressed against his lightly furred chest and his hardness into my stomach. Just this felt so good I was afraid I might cry, and could barely imagine anything more at the moment. “I thought this day might never come,” he rasped into my neck, sliding one warm bare leg between mine as I moved an arm around his body to hold him just as tightly. “What made you decide that it was time, Scully?”

I pulled back a little to look at him, pleased to see that he had a gentle smile on his face. Lifting my hands I placed one on each of his cheeks, feeling that he had taken time for a quick shave as they were baby-smooth. “It just is,” I answered simply, brushing my thumbs along his cheekbones, then leaned forward and kissed him briefly, but fully. “Don’t you feel it too?”

“Feel something,” he quipped, his smile growing as he rubbed his leg between mine. I gasped as the top of his thigh pushed against my wetness, the scent of my own arousal drifting up to us both. With no further ado he flipped me onto my back and, leaning over me with the upper half of his body on mine, sank both hands into my hair with his elbows bracketing my shoulders and began to kiss me breathless. This was not my friendly loving kiss of a few moments ago; this was a true lover’s I-need-you-now kiss, with dueling tongues, clicking teeth, bumping noses, and straining bodies. I felt like I’d died and gone to heaven with the feelings he was arousing in me, sensations that I thought I’d so deeply repressed that they would never come back to the surface.

Thank God I was wrong.

I could feel the barely controlled wildness in Mulder’s thrumming body, his lean, powerful muscles taut and on the edge of losing control. It was rising in me too, a desire too long suppressed and about to break free—and for once in my life I didn’t care. Let it come, I thought, pulling him even tighter to me with both arms beneath his shoulders. In more ways than one.

Our naked bodies strained against each other and I wanted him inside me immediately; I didn’t need any foreplay. But Mulder had other ideas. I don’t know how long we kissed, but eventually we had to move our mouths apart before we were asphyxiated, and he immediately began to kiss down my throat and chest between my breasts. I tried to urge him back up but he was having none of it, and when his warm lips closed over one of my taut nipples I fell back bonelessly on the bed. It had been so long since a man suckled me that I had totally forgotten how amazing it felt. Warmth spread through my body, centering between my legs, even as his long fingers toyed with the other one.

He switched nipples and I let out a throaty moan though I’d been mostly silent before this. Mulder groaned low in response, sucking harder and swirling his tongue even as he leaned back a bit and one hand skimmed down my body under the covers, moving them off of me. I arched up against him as cool air hit my overheating body, holding his head to me with both hands sunk into his thick, soft hair. 

I had never been so aroused in my life, not even my first time at age seventeen; I’d been so excited and nervous and shook so badly that my equally-inexperienced boyfriend almost didn’t go through with it. I wasn’t shaking this time nor was I nervous any longer, and the anticipation was greater than it had been that time.

His warm hand moved slowly down my flat belly, pushing the covers before it, then slid between my legs as I parted them for him. “Oh, God, Mulder,” I breathed as he gently explored my labia, stroking me softly yet firmly. “”Jesus—you know just how to touch me.”

“I’m really out of practice at this, but I’ll do my best,” he murmured in a husky voice, letting go of my nipple and shifting around on the bed. When I realized what he was about to do I nearly stopped him, then reconsidered. If this was what he really wanted as part of our lovemaking I would let him, but I had never gotten much out of a man going down on me.

Only moments later did I discover that those few other men I’d been with had no clue whatsoever on how to do this to a woman. First he licked and sucked all around my vaginal opening, savoring me like a fine dessert and making soft little nummy noises, which just about drove me out of my mind. But then he really got down to work on my clit, using both hands to gently pull the surrounding flesh away and expose it to his incredibly talented tongue. I was amazed at how he was touching me in all the right ways until I realized that I was making enough noise to direct traffic, never mind wordlessly tell my lover what he was doing right. He whipped me into a frenzy in a very short time, then kept me there for God only knows how long before finally finger-fucking me while rubbing my clit with his tongue until I exploded in the most fierce, mind-blowing orgasm I’d ever experienced. 

“My God, Mulder!” I finally said, thunderstruck, some time later when I had regained at least some of the use of my pleasure-dazed brain. “Where in the hell did you learn to do that?”

When I’d become aware of my surroundings again he was laying on his back and holding me in his arms, my supine body draped partly across his, my head resting on his gently moving chest. “I watch a lot of porn; I’ve never hidden it,” he admitted. “But mostly I was paying attention to what you liked. And to be honest, I never much cared for going down on a woman before you, and already I can’t wait to do it again.”

“Me too, but I want you inside me first,” I said, lifting my head and nuzzling his throat, darting my tongue out to taste his salty, warm skin which brought a rumbling groan from deep inside him. “You ready?”

“Baby, I was born ready,” he rolled me onto my side, smiling down lovingly into my face. “God, Scully, are we really here?”

“We’d better be, or this is the most realistic dream I’ve ever had,” I said, smiling back at him, feeling so happy that I could have burst from it. I hadn’t felt this way in so long that it was strange, but welcome. “And if anyone wakes me up I’ll kill them.”

“Me on top? Or do you wanna drive?” he said as I laid back, stroking my body from my chest below my collarbones down to just above my mound, leaving his hand splayed over my belly between my hipbones. 

“Mmn, you on top sounds wonderful,” I all but purred, still replete and sated from the orgasm of only moments before. I knew I probably wouldn’t come again in the missionary position but was looking forward to watching him. He was masculine grace and beauty in motion and I already couldn’t get enough of looking at him, never mind touching.

He rose and moved between my open legs, eyes boring down into mine the entire time. The soft yellow light from the bathroom backlit his lean body while the blue glow from the window showed me the look on his beloved face, which was suffused with passion and longing, eyes slitted down to dark triangles with concentration. Then he glanced down and, leaning back on his heels, gently inserted a finger into me, probing and stroking in and out briefly. “God, I can’t get over how wet you are, how much you obviously want me,” he murmured in a wondering tone, glancing up at my face again before looking back down at our bodies. Then he leaned over me and, balanced on one arm, took hold of his cock just above the base and angled it down to enter me. A wild shiver of anticipation chased over my entire body, momentarily covering me with gooseflesh. Then I, too, directed my full attention to what was happening between my legs.

“I do, Mulder. I want you more than I’ve ever wanted anyone or anything in my life,” I told him readily, stretching my arms above my head and holding onto the pillow there like it was a life preserver. “I need you like I need my next breath.”

“Me too, Scully. Me too.” Still holding himself he began to slide into me, going slow and pushing only a short way in before backing out just a bit and then pushing in again. It was sweet torture and I let out a long, low moan but didn’t move despite how badly I wanted to, afraid he’d pop out if I did since he was going in so shallowly. Just the sight of him holding himself as he began to enter me just about drove me out of my mind.

I was quickly sinking into a thoughtless haze of pleasure the deeper he went. Finally he let go of himself and stretched out over me, hands just below my armpits, looking down at me as his hips moved forward and back in short, shallow strokes. Sweat was beading his forehead and I realized just how hard he was holding himself in check when he said, “How is this, Scully? Not too fast?”

“Nowhere near, aah, in fact it’s nowhere near enough!” I said almost desperately, hooking my feet around the back of his knees and grabbing his forearms, then pulling him towards me with my legs. He sank deeply all the way into me and both of us cried out, me with both the overwhelming fullness both physical and the mental knowing I finally had Mulder inside me.

We both froze, Mulder staring down at me with wide eyes and me up at him, suddenly realizing that he might not like what I’d done. Then he dispelled that notion by dropping down to his elbows, dislodging my hands which I wrapped around his neck, and cupping my face. “That was so fucking hot; I was afraid I might hurt you but I guess not! I love what you do to me, Scully,” he rasped before leaning down to kiss me. While doing so he began to move, thrusting in and out as much as he could in this position. He was using just his hips to move and his body rubbed against mine from mound to chest, ratcheting up my arousal even more which I would not have thought possible. 

We kissed deeply as our bodies danced together, mine answering his thrusts without any conscious thought from me. He was just barely holding himself up off my chest on his elbows but it didn’t feel uncomfortable or smothering despite how much larger he was than me, instead being comforting—and the way he was kissing me while cupping my face with both hands made me feel like the most desirable woman in the universe. I was lost in a haze of pleasure the likes of which I had never before even imagined, almost overwhelmed by the sensations seemingly coming from everywhere. 

To my surprise I began to realize that I was rising towards another orgasm—not only unusual for me in general, but especially in this position. But the way his body was rubbing against my mound as well as the push and pull of his long cock were stimulating my clit almost perfectly. When I realized it I broke the kiss. “Don’t stop, Mulder, keep going just like this,” I whispered against his lips, amazed at what was about to happen. I had rarely come with a man inside me and then only with a lot of manual stimulation, usually doggie-style where I could touch myself the way I needed. Though I had also rarely talked during sex before this I began to babble, mostly in amazement. “I’m almost there, God I’m going to come with you inside me, don’t stopohdon’tstopOHGODMULDER!”

I arched up beneath him when it hit, almost dislodging him from inside me before he thrust himself all the way back in. It was one of the defining moments of my life. I had thought that the orgasm from his mouth was amazing but this one blew it away, due in no small part to having his long, substantial cock inside me to clench with my pulsating inner muscles. As I sank back into the bed he was peppering my face with kisses, babbling at me in return: “God you are so hot, Scully, that was beautiful, I love you so much, Jesus I’m gonna come, you ready for me?”

“Ohhh yeah, come in me, want to watch you,” I breathed up at him as he rose back up on his arms above me. I grabbed his biceps and lifted my knees to grip his hips with my calves, rocking us back and forth when he began to plunge into me deeply. Just the sight of his long, lean body working over me almost had me close to coming again, but I was too caught up in watching his climb to finish to notice except with a small corner of my mind. He rode me hard with long powerful thrusts, wild dark eyes staring down into mine until his face contracted and he threw his head back, letting out a long, low, guttural moan as his body slammed into mine one final time and he stiffened, jerking hard against my body. Every muscle was taut and ridged, veins on his arms and neck and belly popping from the force of his orgasm. 

Only moments later I followed him, distantly stunned at having a third astounding orgasm in one session and from nothing more than penetration. It wasn’t as powerful as the other two but wonderful nonetheless. When I came down from it Mulder was laying on me from the chest down, holding himself up on his elbows and smiling dazedly down at me. “Did you just come again?” he murmured, brushing the hair out of my face with both hands. 

“Yeah—and I never have before from just a man inside me, nor in this position,” I breathed as faint aftershocks shuddered through me, too floored by that last orgasm to play coy. If this stroked his ego then it was nothing but good—I refused to let myself play head games when in bed with Mulder. 

He groaned and bucked against me when my muscles contracted around him. “God, Scully, this is almost more than I can take,” he said, then leaned down to kiss me briefly, just barely shaking hands still stroking my hair back from my temples. “Almost, but thankfully not quite.”

“Good thing, too, because I can’t live without this, without you, from now on,” I said honestly, meeting his eyes squarely and with no pretense. “This is what I was afraid of all these years, that I might lose myself in you, but now I find I don’t care. If this is losing myself then I should have done it a long time ago.”

“I’m lost in you, too,” he said, gazing down at me with such love in his gaze that I felt tears rising behind my eyes, though I didn’t dare let them loose in case he misunderstood. “And I welcome it too.”

I sighed out a contented breath as he leaned down to kiss me again, and swept my hands up and down his damp back from shoulders to nicely rounded ass, where I let them rest for a moment. “We should get some sleep,” I said when we finally broke the kiss and he carefully moved off of me with a low groan. “Got work tomorrow.”

Mulder snuggled up next to me, resting his head on my shoulder and nuzzling my neck as one arm snaked around my waist and a heavy, hairy leg landed across my shins. “Fuck work, let’s stay here and lose ourselves in each other some more, all day tomorrow,” he said, his voice already sounding drowsy. “I never wanna go back to being just myself again. ‘s boring.”

His head became heavy on my shoulder and as his breathing evened out I realized that he was already asleep. Between a flight to England and back in less than forty-eight hours and the first bout of sex in who knew how many years—never mind just how energetic that sex had been!—I really couldn’t blame him. I wished I could join him in slumber but knew that if I didn’t get up now that we would indeed stay here all day tomorrow and I couldn’t allow that no matter how appealing it sounded. If we began doing things like that now then we’d probably never stop, and we still had a lot going on with the X-Files that we didn’t dare blow off to have wild sex all day. Unfortunately. God, sometimes I really hated being a responsible adult.

Moving carefully but purposefully I managed to extract myself from Mulder’s embrace, though it was akin to wrangling an octopus that didn’t want to let go of me. Even asleep he seemed to be aware that I was leaving. 

I had thought that I loved Mulder before we made love but now I knew that the feeling I’d had then was barely a drop in the bucket to what I now felt. I hadn’t realized how much closer we would be afterward and smiled to myself thinking about it as I dressed. For once I wasn’t going to analyze something to death but just ride with it, see where it took us, and trust that Mulder loved me as much as I loved him. Knowing that, I could relax and settle in for what was likely to be the ride of my life.

***

“What’re you thinking about? You’ve got the sexiest little smile on your face.”

I turned to look at Mulder, who had his head propped up on one hand, elbow on the bed, gazing down at me with those dark, inscrutable eyes. I could just see him in the dimness of the hotel room, which was faintly lit by the neon sign outside the partially closed blinds. “Sorry if I woke you. I was remembering our first time. I love that memory, and it usually helps me get to sleep.”

“Having trouble dozing off again? Well, Doc, I have a little something for that.” His hand snaked under the covers to gently squeeze my left breast, thumb brushing over the already-taut nipple. “If that’s what you’re thinking about I’m happy to oblige, and the way I see it, if once didn’t work, twice should do the trick.”

I didn’t argue as he ran his hand down my body. Since the first time we’d never been able to get enough of each other and I had no problem with it. I hadn’t let my desire for him bother me since that incredible first time and had missed him with a deep, bottomless yearning while he was gone. Now, though I was tired and even a little tender from our earlier gymnastics since my body was still getting used to having regular sex again, there was no question of turning him away. 

Rolling on my side I met him face-on and wrapped my leg over his hip, bringing our bodies together so that I could feel his rapidly stiffening cock against my belly as he wrapped a strong arm around my waist. “I’ll never forget the past, but I’m more than happy to make new memories with you every chance we get,” I murmured against his lips before capturing them in a kiss. Even if I hadn’t been thinking about the most profound sexual experience of my life I’d have been aroused just from Mulder being so close to me. As we came together I let the past and future go, and concentrated on the present.


End file.
